Your Own Worst Enemy - Part Three

This section is going to take a look at the ten different self-defeating behaviors listed in the introduction. As you saw in the last chapter, there could be other items which are also self-defeating behaviors as well, so don't think by any means what follows is a definitive list.

These are only a few of the most common, looked at in more detail to help train you in what to look for.

How can you tell if something you're doing is self-defeating?

Pay Attention

Self-awareness is truly the first step to understanding self-defeating behaviors. If you feel like you're not achieving in the way you ought to, or think somehow you might be holding back; it's time to stop and think about what's going on.

What are the thoughts which preceded this action? What do you think should have happened instead?

Recognize the Traits Involved

What can get confusing is how sometimes self-defeating behaviors cluster in groups. For example, you might be avoiding risk by procrastinating. Ask yourself, in what ways are you holding back?

Look for the Root Cause

Where behavior is concerned, there is always a reason for every action. Think about this. What's going on here? What are you afraid of?

What do you think will happen?

These questions will come up again and again as you explore each of the self-defeating behaviors. Don't let these things overwhelm you.

This is all part of better understanding yourself as you walk this journey's path.

Procrastination

What does it mean to Procrastinate?

Put simply; procrastination deals with putting something off until later what you should be doing right now. But is procrastination a time management issue, or is there something else going on entirely?

The problem with procrastination is it might be a signal for a deeper issue. For example, if you're worried about a project because you are unsure how to proceed, you might put it off, hoping you'll figure it out later.

Also, if you're afraid something is going to turn out badly, you will likewise put it off.

How Does Procrastination Hold Us Back?

The cost of procrastination can be very high. Missed deadlines hurt reputations both personally and professionally. When we procrastinate, we are seen as not being very reliable, especially if we make a habit of procrastinating.

Also, even if we do get the work done on time, is it going to be our best quality when we're rushing to do it at the last minute?

Because of all these factors, those around us tend to stop counting on us. We are given fewer opportunities. In the workspace, this might mean having less responsibility and a reduced chance of promotion.

How do I Spot When I'm Procrastinating?

Procrastination is pretty easy to spot. Just ask yourself, "What am I putting off?" Also, if you're rushing around at the last minute to get things done, you probably were procrastinating at some point. Habitual procrastination can be spotted through a series of missed deadlines, a habit of being late, and statements from others regarding your untrustworthiness.